Let go

"Do you still like her?"
"Let's not talk about this, okay?"
"She's moving, you know?"
"Yeah."
"Then, make your move!"
"...I've decided to let go."

I don't know why, but everytime I'm in an excellent mood, someone would just say something that brings you back to the mind. Whatever is the motive: either with a kind intention or as a mere taunt, they always end up making me feel down.

Despite what we promised each other, that there won't be any awkward feelings, there's still always an invisible barrier that blocks us. You seem so distant; so hard to approach. It's just hard to treat you as a friend; because I just don't feel like I'm being treated as one. Perhaps it is me who built the chasm; perhaps I shouldn't think so much; perhaps I'm just not good enough when it comes to handling emotions.

* * * * *

"Go take a photo with her. There may not be another chance."
"No..." I feel bad enough already. Please! You're making me teary!

"Why? Why are you so quiet?"
"Nothing, just sleepy..."

Thank you, guys. I know you're asking that out of concern. But, please bear in mind that as soon as you broach this issue, it's the end of conversation.

* * * * *

I know there's little chance that you'll be reading this. But... You looked so pretty last night. Unfortunately, I had neither the chance nor the guts to compliment you then. Sorry.

"So, you're moving soon?"
"Uh, no. My family has decided to defer it for a year."

I was a little surprised that the news didn't make me feel any better. The air was heavy with a sense of longingness.

"Well, all the best!"

A warm handshake. And you gave an encouraging smile... Which I did not acknowledge. Again, sorry.

* * * * *

I thought I could live on with this feeling without reciprocal, but it turns out that it is just hard to take. Yeah, I just have to let go...

Huh? Let go? Hah! Good luck!

Sigh, I will... and must... let go...