My Pathetically Cantakerous PC

To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer. ~Philip Howard

The torment is finally over! Can I really complain when I hardly prepared for this one? That’s the problem with a megalomaniac who is arrogantly confident of himself, until reality catches up and proves him as another mere mortal.

Alright, here’s my confession: I have been playing computer games since the second week of the exam, and quite without feeling guilty about it. Perhaps that’s the sin that I have to atone for, when, three days ago, the recalcitrant PC finally decided that enough was enough and refused me my indulgence. Every time I was half-way through the opening credits, the screen would go blank and the next thing I knew, PC restarted. Argh!

I summoned every bit of my patience, waiting for PC to restart. It doesn’t take too long, normally – only just enough for you to grow a beard.

Here was the second try. I crossed my fingers and loaded the game once more. Heck, it just happened again, the same way as before!

Maybe I should just try again after the exam, I told myself. After all, I should be studying at this time. I thus left it until the exam is finally over, which is now!

Okay, maybe dear PC now judges that I’ve been a good boy abstaining from computer games for the past few days (as if I had a choice!) and decides to co-operate. But, who could have guess that he remains as the obstinate ass!

I’ve tried practically everything, from reinstalling the game and the media player which was found to be corrupted, to restoring the system to an earlier checkpoint… Yet, nothing worked! PC is totally incorrigible! It is as if someone (though I can’t think of who) has executed some build-in command hidden inside complexity of PC’s silicon brain – something like Order 66 that turned the Clones into psychotic maniacs.

Oh God! The suffering is supposed to be over and yet, I’m being deprived of the highest form of entertainment! It’s a nightmare!

But wait, why don’t I try another game?

That, I soon find out is equally hopeless. Whenever I insert the disc into the drive, all processes that PC is running would be suspended in action; rigor mortis sets in. It looks like my five-year-old CD has already been grown with mould, rendering it impossible to read any information off the disk.

Alright, PC, I have lost my patience with you and I concede defeat! Playing the soundtrack from the Phantom of the Opera doesn’t help to sooth my nerves. The out-of-tune Transylvanian theme only eerily reminds me of Count Dracula’s leitmotif.

If I can’t play games, then so be it! I can always count on a good novel. And, look at the bright side! I can still blog and surf! Oops, did I just make a suggestion to PC?

The Angels Weep

The Bible tells of the Great Flood,
That cleansed the world from all evils;
Yet the inexorable decay of humanity,
Advances through the passage of time.

War cries and clubs will not shake the foes,
WMD’s will bring “peace” and “harmony”;
No longer is imperialism the order of the day,
Capitalism lends a hand to domination.

Like an Eagle that swoops upon its Prey,
So swift and without a tinge of remorse;
The strong takes from the weak,
But the strife of the weak goes unheard.

Bigot fanatics that terrorise the world,
Preach of none but their narrow views;
And when the rest share not their beliefs,
They are resented as infidels and heretics.

The atavistic lust for wealth and power,
Has transformed many a leader into tyrants;
Autocracy thinly veils the democratic system,
It is the puppeteer who is pulling the strings.

As materialism progresses unchecked,
The dignity of humanity loses its shine;
The world marches towards damnation,
For this foreseen fate, the angels weep.

Is there no means to see eye to eye?
Any dispute can be reconciled with tolerance.
Why are we set apart by creed and breed?
We are after all, brethren of the same kind.

Post-mortem

Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving. ~Albert Einstein

Don’t get misled. I may have suffered from blows in this recent exam but, no, I’m still far from being dead. After all, I’m not the guy whose MSN Messenger’s display name reads “requiescat in pace”, or translated as “rest in peace”.

Forgive me for breaking my promise but the subject still subtly embeds in the psyche. It’s just that sometimes, no matter how much one tells himself not to wallow in the past and to move on with life, he still can’t help revisiting the memories. It’s like watching the replay an old film for the umpteenth time despite the fact that it fills one’s heart with sorrow and makes him sob. That’s all because it means a lot.

But, still, the most important part is that it provides me the opportunity to look for the missing piece, which, despite my frantic search, has not surfaced. Worse, I don’t have a clear picture of happened and is happening. How am I supposed to know which piece is missing when I haven’t even come close to completing the puzzle?

Some may very well think that bygones should at best be left forgotten since the outcome can no longer be altered. However, it helps me to pick up the confidence to end the previous chapter and continue narrating my life in the new one; it forms a link between the present and the future. Perhaps, it is this missing link that I have been searching for.

Now, I understand that I have taken the wrong way round since the very first step. Instead of wooing you and winning your heart before taking the bold step, I did exactly the other way round – spilled out my heart’s contents, watched the drama unfold in a fashion which couldn’t have be more predictable, and tried to mediate the outcome as best as I could. The development is totally unnatural. It gives the uncomfortable, surreal experience of reading a story which starts with the climax, while progressing to the resolution and ends with the development of the plot right after the epilogue. Everything just doesn’t seem to be in place.

It is no wonder that the whole episode doesn’t seem to anyone. No, not even me. The crude jeers of the others have done me no harm. But still, I need to ask you not to bring up the subject.

On another matter, call me clichéd but I can’t think of a better way of wording what I feel about life. We fall from time to time as we progress through life’s journey. From where I have fallen, I have two choices. One is to stand up, let the wound heal in time and move on with life. Another one is to sit there, whine in pain and refuse to continue the journey lest I should fall again. I choose the first option. Learning from the past strengthens the spirit so as to prepare it for tougher challenges to come – that matters the most.

Anyway, thanks for leading me to another small step in the quest of self-discovery and for helping me to learn a new lesson on life. However will the story end, you have been in one of the chapters and this has made a difference.

Insanity Streak

Insanity...is an intellectual pattern. It may have biological causes but it has no physical or biological reality. No scientific instrument can be produced in court to show who is insane and who is sane. ~Robert M. Pirsig

Finally, I have come to the conclusion that it’s a mad world after all.

You see, recently, many lunatics have surfaced, making their presence felt. In fact, their number (and not to say their lunacy) is so overwhelming that they deserve a classification of their own – a new branch of species in the prestigious genus of Homo. Sapiens, rejoice! We have a new member in our big family, the lunaticus.

First, let me introduce to you one of those lunaticus who managed to strike big – Jacobs. At the age of 35, Jacobs had an ambitious plan in mind, that is, to become the smartest person on earth.

Well, how exactly did he think he could earn the title? "Intelligence”, as he defines it, is “the amount of information you have”. So, what he intended to do was to finish a whole collection of encyclopaedia, of course! And so, Jacob became Mr Know-It-All by spending his next one year and 55 days reading 32 volumes of Britannica – and, mind you, he actually finished all those 33,000 pages! Talk about obsession!

Mr Know-It-All was on his way to becoming a millionaire lunaticus, if only he could answer the $32,000 question on erythrocyte. (*Stifled laughter) Okay, okay, quit making fun of a fellow Mensan.

During his quest to becoming the Mr Know-It-All, Jacobs made an aquaintance with Alcott as he started off with A. Mr Alcott deserves mentioning because (guess what!) he is another famous lunatic who came up with a “particularly unusual discipline system: teachers received punishment from the offending pupils.” Such a preposterous idea is “supposed to instill shame in the kids’ mind”. Just don’t ask me how! By the way, this absurd piece of information is acquired from Britannica, but I can’t verify using Encarta.

Speaking of the system of education, sometimes I wonder if students are being burdened with too much stress. For starters, there is a self-professed mad girl who goes around proclaiming her insanity to virtually everyone on the Net. Oh, come to think of those ditties she wrote about herself, you’ll have no excuse not to believe her.

The Net didn’t get its title “the gateway of information” without a reason. News spread quite fast over in the cyber world. Soon, another lunatic who goes by the nickname “Crazy Monk” joined the lunacy, spamming Mad Girl’s blog with Buddhist scriptures (blasphemy!) chosen at random from the library back in his monastery.

If you think this insanity could go no further, think again! A few days back, Crazy Monk professed his love towards Mad Girl in his blog! Again, blasphemy! His common sense must have been knocked out by a falling tome while dusting the collection of scriptures in the library.

Apart from those highlighted here, the world is not short of fine specimens of homo lunaticus. Of them, I will not speak further for I have already lambasted a tad too much. The next thing I know, they may be coming at me with clubs! Besides, it is more than incredulous for a mind of the first degree to condescend to so lunatic a subject.

So long, folks! And prosper, lunaticus! Uh… Oh dear, I need to take my meds!