Thursday, May 26, 2005 - 2:53 pm

Insanity Streak

Insanity...is an intellectual pattern. It may have biological causes but it has no physical or biological reality. No scientific instrument can be produced in court to show who is insane and who is sane. ~Robert M. Pirsig
Finally, I have come to the conclusion that it’s a mad world after all.

You see, recently, many lunatics have surfaced, making their presence felt. In fact, their number (and not to say their lunacy) is so overwhelming that they deserve a classification of their own – a new branch of species in the prestigious genus of Homo. Sapiens, rejoice! We have a new member in our big family, the lunaticus.

First, let me introduce to you one of those lunaticus who managed to strike big – Jacobs. At the age of 35, Jacobs had an ambitious plan in mind, that is, to become the smartest person on earth.

Well, how exactly did he think he could earn the title? "Intelligence”, as he defines it, is “the amount of information you have”. So, what he intended to do was to finish a whole collection of encyclopaedia, of course! And so, Jacob became Mr Know-It-All by spending his next one year and 55 days reading 32 volumes of Britannica – and, mind you, he actually finished all those 33,000 pages! Talk about obsession!

Mr Know-It-All was on his way to becoming a millionaire lunaticus, if only he could answer the $32,000 question on erythrocyte. (*Stifled laughter) Okay, okay, quit making fun of a fellow Mensan.

During his quest to becoming the Mr Know-It-All, Jacobs made an aquaintance with Alcott as he started off with A. Mr Alcott deserves mentioning because (guess what!) he is another famous lunatic who came up with a “particularly unusual discipline system: teachers received punishment from the offending pupils.” Such a preposterous idea is “supposed to instill shame in the kids’ mind”. Just don’t ask me how! By the way, this absurd piece of information is acquired from Britannica, but I can’t verify using Encarta.

Speaking of the system of education, sometimes I wonder if students are being burdened with too much stress. For starters, there is a self-professed mad girl who goes around proclaiming her insanity to virtually everyone on the Net. Oh, come to think of those ditties she wrote about herself, you’ll have no excuse not to believe her.

The Net didn’t get its title “the gateway of information” without a reason. News spread quite fast over in the cyber world. Soon, another lunatic who goes by the nickname “Crazy Monk” joined the lunacy, spamming Mad Girl’s blog with Buddhist scriptures (blasphemy!) chosen at random from the library back in his monastery.

If you think this insanity could go no further, think again! A few days back, Crazy Monk professed his love towards Mad Girl in his blog! Again, blasphemy! His common sense must have been knocked out by a falling tome while dusting the collection of scriptures in the library.

Apart from those highlighted here, the world is not short of fine specimens of homo lunaticus. Of them, I will not speak further for I have already lambasted a tad too much. The next thing I know, they may be coming at me with clubs! Besides, it is more than incredulous for a mind of the first degree to condescend to so lunatic a subject.

So long, folks! And prosper, lunaticus! Uh… Oh dear, I need to take my meds!

4 comments:

sjune said...

walaueh......lidat oso can...

and no,u wont be the one getting chased with a club

but seriously if i noe who that monk is i will bantai him till separuh mati

sjune said...

ummm,forgot to mention that james bond is licsenced to kill i am licsenced to bantai :P

(i think i made spelling errors,whatever)

amphibian sp. said...

i think it must had also been the irresponsible action of the blog lunatics cos if by any chance u had been to wei liang's blog b4, it has now been changed completely (obviously by who it's clear) from 'my diary' to 'my dyrrhea'.

which is y, i hav changed my profile name to this one now cos i was a bit horrified when i mischievously entered my name in yahoo n google's search engine n my blog details popped up.

Kryptos said...

oh, i guess that's y u changed wl's link to urs...