Sunday, September 21, 2008 - 7:41 am

Morning Caws


I hate crows. And I'm sure you'd, too, if they wake you up every day at six in the morning without fail. (Oh, except when it's raining. That's why I always welcome morning rains.)

I just can't help wondering what the hell are they doing: All crows are (presumably) assigned with their respective posts within the neighbourhood, trees, lamp posts etc. Then,
  1. Crow I caws.
  2. Crow II reciprocates.
  3. Crow III joins in.
  4. ...
  5. ...
  6. ...
  1. Crow N caws.
Where n → ∞.

But, "caw"is not even a close onomatopoeia. "Honk" would be a better one. Yes, their honks are so awful that they can surely make a honky tonk jealous. It's reasonable to suspect that they're playing "follow the leader" game. (That was one of my earliest conjectures.) But I came up with a more reasonable one. I understand no bird language but these morning caws, erm, honks, is no ordinary morning assembly, because these are no ordinary crows you get in your ordinary back yard. These are evil crows. Evil crows that convene every morning to discuss their evil plans to take over the world.
DAILY EVIL MEETING (Cancelled in the event of rain)
Agenda:
  1. Meeting cawed to order
  2. Speech by Evil Leader
  3. Evil topics of discussion
    1. Evil WORld Domination (E-WORD) Plan A
    2. Evil WORld Domination (E-WORD) Plan B
    3. Evil WORld Domination (E-WORD) Plan C
    4. (Ditto)
  4. Meeting adjourned
I cover my ears with pillows to muffle the awful caws but to no avail. (Evolution has endowed crows with a super-powerful syrinx). Don't get me wrong though. It's not that I'm apathetic over this evil world domination plans by evil crows; but lack of sleep makes me cranky. Evolution has endowed man with a super-powerful brain which nevertheless requires plenty of sleep to recharge, no less than a powerful computer requiring plenty of power to run.

This morning, though, I managed to sleep through the morning caws. But, oh, not for long before the earthquake jolted me awake at seven. That's why I'm here, typing away.

I'd like to go back to sleep now but it seems that the relentless crows aren't going to stop any time soon. Sigh, this is going to be a hell of a day...

4 comments:

Wei Zhi said...

Pinky and the BRAIN BRAin Brain brainnnn BRAIN!

Kryptos said...

it's "they're dinky, they're pinky and the brain brain brain brain BRAIN!" dude.

K.O.J.A. said...

more moolah for u

Lin said...

awww...i, too, hate it when i don't get enough sleep, makes me cranky too =S i feel ur pain...